If you have kids, you are NO stranger to all the crazy reasons that they’ll throw a fit. And yet, no matter how many tantrums you’ve witnessed, you’ll never stop being amazed at the things kids can freak out over. So we scoured Twitter for some of the funniest, craziest, most ludicrous reasons kids cry. Then, we asked our followers – Why did your kids cry?
The kids are going back to school, and we’re having all the feelings about it. But at least we can take to Twitter to know that we are not alone. Check out these sometimes hilarious, sometimes kicks you in the feels, but always keepin’ it real, back to school tweets.
Well when you put it that way….
Everybody wants their kids to go back to school, until they’re stranded on the toilet without toilet paper and no one’s around to grab a new roll.
Told my stepdaughter she could only pick one dress for her first day of school look and she stormed off in a huff so I’m over here in Kohl’s rage sniffing autumn candles if you need me. #momlife#parenting#kohls#momsquad#dadlife
If thinking this is wrong, I don’t wanna be right….
Am I wrong to expect mimosas at this 9:15am meeting at my child school? It does say on the announcement “do not bring children if possible”. So in my opinion it would be very misleading if no alcohol is served as we prepare our children for Kindergarten.
In case you were wondering if I was a wreck dropping off The Boy for his first day of middle school today, I WAS NOT. I unceremoniously told him to get out of the car and didn’t start getting teary until I was more than 5 miles away. #MomLife
As a Mom, I’m contractually obligated to think my kids are adorable. The cutest kids in the world even. So when I look at my stunningly beautiful children, I do so with the awareness that I’m wearing some serious Mom-colored glasses. I don’t gush about it because the real world may see them through normal glasses and think, “Meh.” But when your bestie, who also happened to have a stint as a Mom to a real life baby model, says, “Hey, have you considered sending in her pics to a modeling agency?,” you think maybe your kid really is as cute as you think she is!
Of course, being a baby model is more than just being cute. And it’s a whole process to get into the game, but thankfully the bestie was there to hold my hand and walk me through the process. So I followed her advice, got some bright solid colored outfits and bought myself a Groupon to the JCPenney portrait studio and crossed my fingers. We got some great shots so I nervously – but somewhat confidently – went to the websites for some reputable local youth talent agencies and submitted my daughter’s pictures.
It wasn’t even 12 hours later before I got our first rejection email. I was immediately thrown into the five stages of baby model rejection. Should you find yourself thinking about entering the cutthroat world of baby modeling, you should be ready to experience all of these feelings as well. (But I’m sure you won’t – because your kid is adorable!)
There are two kinds of toddlers: the kind that are super picky eaters and the kind that aren’t. And there’s a ton of helpful information out there to help your picky eater. Which is awesome! But as much as having kids that won’t eat anything is a major PITA, I’m here to tell you that having kids that eat EVERYTHING isn’t that great either. So whether your kid is a human garbage disposal too, or you just want to feel better about your situation, here are five things that are major downsides to having kids that everyone considers to be “great” eaters.
We live in a fast paced world where there are opportunities around every corner. And we’re supposed to say, “YES!.” I mean, it’s the age of #YOLO and #NoRegrets. It’s a time when we’re supposed to grab the bull by the horns and when Andy Cohen asks you if you regret anything you said or did this season you can proudly say “I don’t believe in regrets.” (I’m looking at you Luann). But me? I’m sitting over here being a medical test dummy for my 3 year old and thinking how I absolutely should not have let her get the Doc McStuffins kit for pooping in the potty. Sure, I could try to brush it off as a “learning experience” but we’d rather go back in time and prevent the thermometer wet willy I just got from ever happening. That, and these other 99 things.
Not accepting WAY more help when it was offered in the first couple years of parenting.
That one Halloween when I ate all the candy.
Not getting more pedicures.
Wearing white shirts when my kids were babies.
The number of times I was too lazy to make myself a meal and had chips and salsa for dinner.
That one trip to Reno with two kids under two and cramming four people in two airplane seats.
The time I assumed my kids fussiness was due to teething and not to an ear infection.
Not bringing an extra pair of pants.
Taking all three kids to the movies at the same time.
Telling the kids about the super fun and exciting thing we’re not doing until next week.
Beating myself up about not losing the baby weight.
The time I peeked in on the kids at the YMCA and the baby saw me and started to cry.
Buying so many tubs of low carb ice cream before deciding I don’t care about carbs.
Not taking more pictures of myself with the kids when they were teeny tiny babies.
Asking my son how I looked in my bathing suit. (Spoiler alert: “Squishy”)
Not getting more pedicures.
Not hiring a babysitter when I just needed a break.
Believing my kid when he said he definitely had his shoes. (He did not).
Anytime anyone ever made me feel bad about any of my parenting choices.
Because despite all these regrets, I love my kids, I (usually) love my life, and yes, I learned from allllllll those mistakes. Next time I’m super-sizing, signing my kid up for summer camp the day registration opens and getting that epidural dammit!
As Moms (and Dads) sometimes we are shocked by the things that people think it’s okay to say – and do – us. Unfortunately, due to our broken #mombrains, we don’t always come up with the perfect response in the moment. So instead, we write anonymous passive aggressive lighthearted letters full of mom humor to the people that have wronged us. Yes, I’m talking about more letters to even more people that made us downright salty. Did you miss Part One? Make sure to check it out here and then come back to virtually punch some people in the face with me. As always, let us know who you’d add in the comments!