When Dance Parties Go Bad

The morning started out in our usual way. Mommy makes coffee for herself, breakfast for all the kids, makes Cole’s lunch while the kids eat, and then once the kids are done/too restless to eat without making a bigger mess than I’m prepared to handle we move to the living … Read More

For the Love of Being Right

Things you should know about me: I LOVE to be right. I HATE to be wrong. Now sure, most of us do, but I’m brave enough to admit that I can be kind of, well, obnoxious about it. I’m also incredibly stubborn. I know, it’s an incredibly attractive combination ain’t … Read More

Alexa is My Co-Parent

Considering getting an Amazon Echo? You should. You really, really should. Read more on why Alexa is the PERFECT lady robot/coparent at thesaltymamas.com.

Those “Cheap” Summer Movies

Looking for a way to save money on movie theater concessions? Try this trick from thesaltymamas.com #savingmoney #movieswithkids #familymovies

Those summer movies may SEEM like a deal- until your kid discovers the concession stand. How we save money- and still get treats!- at those “cheap” summer movies, from thesaltymamas.com.

6:59 am is Too Early for Play-Doh

When is the right time for Play-Doh? And other Mom schedule preferences #momlife #playdoh #ihateplaydoh #kidsactivities #kidsschedule #momschedule #SAHM #SAHMschedule #dailyroutine #dailyroutineforkids #toddlerschedule #earlymorningactivities #afternoonactivities #parenting #dadlife #momhumor #mommyhumor #funnymommy #sarcasticmommy

There are certain things that should not happen before 7am.

The phone should not ring. The neighbors gardener shouldn’t use his blower outside my bedroom window.

And my children should not be playing with Play Doh.

It just doesn’t fit into my idea SAHM schedule.

When is the right time for Play-Doh? And other Mom schedule preferences #momlife #playdoh #ihateplaydoh #kidsactivities #kidsschedule #momschedule #SAHM #SAHMschedule #dailyroutine #dailyroutineforkids #toddlerschedule #earlymorningactivities #afternoonactivities #parenting #dadlife #momhumor #mommyhumor #funnymommy #sarcasticmommy

Yet here we are. 6:59 on a Wednesday and we’re elbow deep in Play Doh. Mommy confession: Play-Doh is NOT my jam. Most of this is because I’m a control freak monster. Yes, I’m one of those people that spends way too much time and energy making sure none of the doh colors touch.

If I have to sit and play endlessly with it, I at least need to be touching vibrant pinks and blues and neon greens. Getting orders from my son the likes of, “Make me a bicycle, clown!” are just too depressing when I have to use a color that is far to close to that of my baby’s endless poops.

And frankly, it requires far more parental supervision that I’m ready to provide this early in the day. My day is a carefully constructed model shaped around when I’m most prepared to tend to my children’s needs.

 

An average day should go as follows:

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